“Be kind to all creatures, this is true religion”, Buddha once said. But what exactly is the difference between being kind and being nice?
This difference can be better understood by putting oneself through the following circumstances.
Situation: 1 Imagine a friend who tends to depend on you for everything. This tendency of his does not let him grow. Having realized this, would you still help him?
Situation: 2 One of your grandparents is suffering from an illness due to old age which has made their life miserable. It is keeping them up all night and has ripped them off any peace. Unfortunately, there is no cure. The only source of permanent relief for them is death. Will you pray for them to die?
The above two circumstances will put you in a dilemma because what actually is good for the person may not be the nicest thing to do. In the first case, a nice thing to do would be to help your friend but deep down you know it is not good for them. In the second case too, it is not nice to wish death for somebody but deep down you know that it is the only thing which will give them permanent relief.
Being nice to people means reacting in a way that they feel good. It does not take into account the consequences of your actions in the long run. Whereas being kind to a person means reacting in a way that is right for them, whether they like it or not. When we truly care about somebody, we tend to be kind to them, even if it gets us listed in their bad books.
Unfortunately, while interacting with other people we fall for nice words and often overlook kindness. This leads to nothing but disappointment when we see the real faces of people hidden behind those nice words.
In order to understand your reality, start distinguishing between nice and kind people.
Let me know your views on this